Hi folks. Sorry for the absence of posting the last week. I rather much collapsed in a heap after giving my family a crash course in NYC last weekend. The rest of the week has just been a blur.

The picture above was taken Monday night on the Promenade above the Brooklyn/Queens Expressway. You're looking at lower Manhattan (east side), near the South Street Seaport (not pictured).

Thought I'd bring you a bit of the city. (Actually I'm trying to give it away, but no one seems crazy enough to take it.) Enjoy!

i've chosen to start pummeling your eyes with puzzles since my eyes have been driving me nuts lately from all the computer time.

here's the first:


is anyone around to see you moving your head around like that?

Trigopolis, my former domain, was domain camped...and I want it back....they want at least 50 from me...

i find it curious that i get such news on blogs now, even though official word on this movie has apparently been circulating for months. suddenly i've seen it on four blogs so far today, but i can't help but join the party.

Jurassic Park Four!
Coming Soon! - Latest News

it is no secret that i ADORE Jurassic Park and talk about it as much as possible. i've read the first book three times, but it's still better to SEE the dinosaurs. you can argue the validity and quality of all three films all you want, but who the hell cares? honestly. you can see incredibly realistic dinosaurs killing people. and Jeff Goldblum, hello! what is better?

this is supposedly a letter to Dr. Laura, taking a tongue-in-cheek interpretation of her using the word of the Bible in her advice. we must all remember that even though there are some wonderful moral guidelines in the Bible, there is also a lot of very odd (in these times, at least) ramblings. remember to only follow the rules that are convenient to you, because i know a lot of you love your shellfish :)
_______

Dear Dr. Laura,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's law. I have learned a great deal from you, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend homosexuality, for example, I will simply remind him or her that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other laws in Leviticus and Exodus and how to best follow them. To wit:

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Leviticus 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. How should I deal with this?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as stated in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Leviticus 15:19-24). The problem is, how can I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

Leviticus 25:44 states that I may buy slaves from the nations that are around us. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Canadians, but not Mexicans. Can you clarify?

I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

A friend of mine says that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Leviticus 10:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

Leviticus 20:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Sincerely,
A devoted listener

OK folks, if you are even the least bit interested in the shuttle launch, then this post is for you.

AOL users get privilege to 24/7 live coverage of the astronaut's mission.
They also are giving us live footage of the takeoff Tuesday morning, 10:39 eastern time.

AOL users click here


For the non AOL users, maybe for once you might envy. But I'm no preacher. Here is a link that should do just as well.

space.com

I am hoping your bandwidth supports the four camera multiview!

Who would win in a fight between these two titans? I'm speaking physically as well as mentally.

Of course, if it comes down to a duel, Miyagi gets a light sabre.

Quote:

Anything try first time, will fail, try again. - Mr. Miyagi

Do or do not, there is no try. - Yoda

Okay kiddies, my turn to do a movie review. Let's see if I can do it without managing to spoil any of the good parts. I took my preschoolers to see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory today. Now, I'm a huge fan of the original Willy Wonka flick from years past. I grew up watching that movie at least four or five times a year.

Shall we see how a few categories compare from versions old and new? We shall (too bad you don't have a choice.)

CAST
Wonka - Played by none other than Johnny Depp, he pulls off the peculiar oddities of Wonka better than no other. The man has been a pirate, a vampire, and a mutant with scissors for hands, he should have no difficulty playing a chocolatier. Keep your ear out for a few catch phrases from the original movie, but know that the similarities are few and far between. (In a good way.)
Brats and their parents - The similarities here are much the same as the original movie. A glutton, a snot, a tv addict, and a gum chewing fiend. A few parental gender reversals have taken place when compared with the old version of the movie (in Violet and Mike's parents specifically.) The added effects created for the children and their demises are clever and more appealing to the eye. Ah technology.
Charlie and Grandpa Joe - Sweet as ever, but much more intelligent than the original Charlie. Not book smart mind you, just a better sense of knowing. You'll have to see for yourself to understand. No belching this time around, that's for sure.
Oompa Loompas - Originating from the land where nothing tastes good, you can understand how Wonka coaxes them into his factory. The caring relationship Gene Wilder had with his Loompas has been replaced by Depp's childlike awe and fascination in the creatures. Were these guys on soul train or what?

MUSIC
I must admit that I rather enjoyed the older version's musical selection than that of the new. I was fearful that the annoying puppet jingle you can hear in the trailers of this movie would run rampant the entire hour and a half. Let me set your fears aside; you only hear it once. The Oompa Loompas, although occasionally difficult to understand, are way more snazzy this go around though.

SCENERY
The Chocolate Room was meant to represent heaven on Earth (in my eyes anyway). Now add to the already wonderful room several Tim Burton props and contraptions, and you get the new room in all it's glory. You may not be able to lick the wallpaper, but by God you can eat the grass!

TRANSPORTATION
Wonkatania - The original version of the Wonkatania was far scarier than the Tim Burton version. The new ship holds many more Oompa Loompas and the tunnel she travels down reminded me of the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disney World. But then again, perhaps Johnny had a relapse and commandeered the Wonkatania too! Are the Oompa Loompa's working for rum?? Hrmmmm
Wonkavator - The newest version of the Wonkavator is a bit more logical (as far as logic goes in fantasies) in that you can actually see how the machine works. Believable is a good thing in this day and age.

Last but never least, here you will find useless information about the movie that will intrigue you more than you'd like to admit!

IMDB Charlie and the Chocolate Factory Facts May your dreams be filled with Johnny Depp smothered in chocolate!

Man commits suicide after the end of the new Harry Potter book was ruined for him. and i thought i placed too much on pop culture.

"...when he started wearing that wizard hat around town, we really should have seen that as a cry for help.' "

Google Moon - Lunar Landing Sites

look closely :)

I would just like everyone who reads this to bend their hand and have a moment of silence for the death of beloved Star Trek actor James Doohan. (Scotty, the transport engineer.)

Interesting Factoids: His boys could swim at 80! His last kid was born when he was 80 years of age.
His ashes will be sent into space.

I'm going to miss you.

Sumo wrestling

air hockey

canyon glider

gravity well

kill at will!!

smurf me ( smurf name generator )

Dear Abby,

Its been about a year and a half since I've been old enough to perform Jury duty and I've been wondering why I haven't been invited to the party? How should I go about informing the wonderful state of California I would be thrilled to serve as a juror without offending the person who sends out the invitations?

Scincerely,
John Bravo

Clinton wades into GTA sex storm

Have you heard about this? When the news first broke a few weeks ago that Rockstar had created sex minigames for GTA San Andreas for PC, people called it clever manipulations by hackers--which Rockstar says is the truth.

Well, Hillary Clinton must be bored, becase she's leading the charge against Rockstar by asking the U.S. Federal Trade Commission to investigate Rockstar.

Rockstar insists that the 'Hot Coffee' mod was created by a Dutch hacker who took the game's code and created the X-rated mod for PC gamers to download and install into their game so, unlike the PS2 version, gamers can take their girlfriends on dates in San Andreas, but instead of a brief cutscene with muffled sounds, could actually participate in a mini-game about, well... you know...

So Mrs. Clinton seizes the opportunity. Some of us could wish the thing was a total hack-job...

... and then this bombshell today when, on Attack of the Show, Kevin Perira revealed that a PS2 code-hacking software ARMAX can let gamers access the 'Hot Coffee' mini-game on a PS2... which means it was a planned segment all along...

... oops...

Pet fish leaps into boy's mouth, chokes him to death!!

WHATever. what a way to go!

You've see those kids looking all weird sliding on their heels? Well I see them like every day at work. I keep saying I'm goona get me some.

after weeks of telling myself I would, I went to the sports chalet and had this sales girl help me try on a pair. I couldn't figure out how to roll on them. she's all "you gotta get a running start" im NOT gonna run if I don't know how to walk!


well I bought 'em anyway.

so, I am probably the only 30 year old on the planet sporting these Heelys. I am pretty darn sure I am the only one wearing them while working at a pet store. funny enough, the management is cool with me wearing them. most of them are just waiting for me to bust my ass.
as I learned how to use these things, after a full day of rolling around. I have to laugh, I forgot what its like to exert myself in kid like ways. Having the wheel under your heel i.e. " Heelys " , you literally have the feeling of wearing one inch high heels. and if you don't walk with your toes landing first while walking you'll slip and fall on your ass. try walking toe first. It's weird. Also, due to the awkward way you have to get yourself to roll, your right calf, and left quad and a few upper and lower back muscles need some shapening up. let's not forget to mention whatever tendon you pulled not quite pulling the roll off. With all these aches and pains, I need a hot tub.

If you haven't heard of Coheed and Cambria, you have now. This is one of my favorite bands ever. I was turned on to them by a significant other. I sat down one day at a Starbucks to listen to the CD I bought based upon only the good word of mon amis. I listened to it and wasn't impressed, till I listened to the lyrics. After mild scrutiny I noticed that the CD wasn't just a collection of songs, it was a progressive story....with ROBOTS!

Basic Story: Coheed and Cambria are lovers. A man named Claudio has to kill his kids before a virus matures in them and destroys the universe or something. I don't really like to say too much of what I think because you're supposed to figure out the story for yourself, or at least provide a personal interpretation of it.

Most Romantic Lyrics: I'll shoot, you run
Most Meaningful Lyrics to Me: I've been cautious with the words I extend, allow this year before the world starts to end.
Lyrics That Hit Close to Home: Its a tie between several
I fought the decisions that called and lost my mark in the relevant piece in this, I will come reformed
The sin that shapes your voice carries my ears this new dissease, but I don't want to sleep without you, so I bid to you goodnight, tonight sleep tight my gun
At the end of my day I found out you weren't worth what I thought of you.

For at least a year straight there hasn't been a week where I haven't listened to the entire CD at least 5 times, and that isn't hyperbole.


Links:
Coheed and Cambria Official Site
Link to A Favor House Atlantic Music Video

"I am the terror that flaps in the night..."

Better late than never, a quick look at "Batman Begins": THE movie of 2005 that was so good I'm scared to watch "Fantastic Four" for fear that film may leave a bad taste in my mouth, thereupon defiling the great taste, less filling that is "Batman Begins".

"Begins" rocketh mightily, and the reasons why are so numerous. One big reason, however, is the fact that "Begins" is a hundred times better than "Batman Forever" and "Batman And Robin" combined. There's just such a nicer level of sophistication in "Begins" that wasn't present in the previous two films. Allow me, if you will, to pontificate on the fall of the franchise prior to its glorious rebirth.

"Batman Forever" wasn't bad to begin with, but it was a hard pill to swallow seeing Val Kilmer take over Micheal Keaton's role. What made the film utterly obnoxious was Tommy Lee Jones' portrayal of Harvey "Two-Face" Dent. Don't get me wrong, I love Tommy Lee, but the Two-Face I much preferred was the gangsterland-style version presented in Batman: The Animated Series (which, admittedly, is the source of my fondest Batman memories).

But if "Forever" was a bad film, "Batman & Robin" was complete garbage. How George Clooney got the part of Wayne is beyond me. Batman's mystique was completely ruined, as the detective crimefighter would simply walk up to police crime scenes and start witty banter with the cops instead of appearing from the shadows and disappearing with silence.

No ninja tactics whatsoever.

And Arnold Schwarzenegger. No thank you, sir: Mr. Freeze is a very cold individual and makes no jokes.

And two words: Bat Nipples. (shudder)

What made the first two Batman films so enjoyable was the dark atmosphere, liberally supplied by director Tim Burton, IMHO. By "Batman & Robin", we saw a slaughterhouse combination of the 1989 Batman film and the original Adam West TV series. The result was nothing short of disturbing.

And a brief off-topic rant: the new animated Batman series is nothing but a vehicle to sell toys and the villain redesigns are blasphemy.

But enough of that; "Batman Begins" is where its at. Take "Spider-Man", for instance. One of the best parts in "Spider-Man" was watching Peter Parker BECOME Spiderman. Having an entire film dedicated to the evolution of the Batman? Gold. Solid gold.

The acting? Top notch. Christian Bale nails the role with finesse and chutzpah. I remember Bale not as the "American Psycho" but better in a little film called "Equilibrium", which I demand you find, rent/buy and watch if you haven't already.

And did you know that was Gary Oldman as Gordon? I think the hair and mustache completely threw me off, but I was very happy with his performance, also. Course I'm such a big Oldman fan, anyways. "The Fifth Element" anyone?

Then there's Sir Michael Caine. He's no Michael Gough (Alfred in all four previous Batman films) but he brings a delightful visage to the part--casting Alfred as more of a father figure for Bruce Wayne opposed to Gough's grandfatherly Alfred. Good humor, also.

You've got to hand it to director Christopher Nolan for wanting to do it all right from the start. From the story and the overall dark, violent feel to the large majority of live stunts (very little CG was involved). Nolan wanted it all to look utterly believable. Many of the sets? Real, built in Admiralty Hanger No. 2 near Bedford outside London, one of the largest hangers in the world. The stunts? Very real--so whether it's Batman flying over the city or the Batmobile flying down the road, it's totally legit. There was a whopping 400 visual effects shots in the film alone.

Take that, George Lucas.

And the Batmobile: okay, okay, I'll admit, I was pretty critical of the 'Tumbler' when I first saw pictures of it, preferring the original 1989 Batmobile. But after the obligatory chase scene, my opinion of the tank-like vehicle changed. Everybody will be wanting one of these babies.

Now I know the e301 crew has seen this movie, but if you haven't: BELIEVE. THE. HYPE. I don't care what anybody says. "Episode III"? "War of the Worlds"? Keep it. This movie is going to be THE film of 2005, and that's my vote.

EXTRA CREDIT: Who did I quote for the screen capture caption?

back in the day, Nintendo Power used to run all sorts of cheesey comics. they still do now and then, but i don't read them. yes, i still have a subscription. and all my old issues. but enough about my issues. hah, i kill me.

here are the more significant comics in delicious web form:

• Mario
  
• Zelda
  
• Howard and Nester!!!!

Time for a quick quiz?

1. What do you put in a toaster?

The answer is bread. If you said "toast", then give up now and go do something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, "bread", go to question 2.


2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk". What do cows drink?

Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk", please do not attempt the next question. Your brain is obviously overstressed and may even overheat. It may be that you need to content yourself with reading something more appropriate such ! as "Children's World". If you said, "water" then proceed to question three.


3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a greenhouse made from?

Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green bricks", what the heck are you still doing here reading these questions? If you said "glass", then go on to question four.


4. Twenty years ago, a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany. If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany. Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he has time and the plane crashes smack in the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany. Where would you bury! the survivors - East Germany or West Germany or in "no man's land"?
Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else, you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane crash. Your efforts would not be appreciated. If you said, "Don't bury the survivors" then proceed to the next question.


5. If the hour hand on a clock moves 1/60th of a degree every minute then how many degrees will the hour hand move in one hour? Answer: One degree. If you said "360 degrees" or anything other than "one degree", you are to be congratulated on getting this far, but you are obviously out of your league. Turn your pencil in and exit the room. Everyone else proceed to the final question.


6. Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading, six people get off the bus and nine people get on. In Swindon, two people get off and four get on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on. In Swansea, th! ree people get off and five people get on. In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven. What was the name of the bus driver?

Answer: Oh, for heaven sake! It was YOU, Read the first line!!!

click to watch, right-click to d/l

and to think i used to sit here and do this WITHOUT a cat.

Crazy Frog- Axel F

You know, I think I like him. I'm not exactly sure what he is, or what the hell he's doing (other than riding a motorcycle) but he's cute. I almost want to buy the cd version.

have you ever seen Teller and TV's friend's Gunther in the same place? in thinking maybe thats why Teller doesn't talk.

Sick
by Shel Silverstein

"I cannot go to school today,"
Said little Peggy Ann McKay."
I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
My mouth is wet, my throat is dry,
I'm going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I've counted sixteen chicken pox
And there's one more--that's seventeen,
And don't you think my face looks green?

My leg is cut--my eyes are blue--
It might be instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,
I'm sure that my left leg is broke--
My hip hurts when I move my chin,
My belly button's caving in,
My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,
My 'pendix pains each time it rains.
My nose is cold, my toes are numb.
I have a sliver in my thumb.

My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,
I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,
I think my hair is falling out.
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,
My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,
There is a hole inside my ear.

I have a hangnail, and my heart is--what?
What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is. . .Saturday?
G'bye, I'm going out to play!"

BBC NEWS | Entertainment | Film | Plans for robot live action film
New Live-Action Transformers Movie, Steven Spielberg and Dreamworks with Michael Bay

that's hot.

Sky News : The 33 Things To Do Before You Turn 10

we've all seen those lists of things to do before we die, but here's a list to show us the stuff we should've done, but can't fix now. i guess it isn't too late to go roll down a hill, though.

this list is a little too generic for my taste. i've done all but 2 or 3, but i hardly consider any of them particularly essential. i had some different goals when i was that young, including world domination, wearing as much neon as possible at one time, and how to best manipulate my parents into buying the latest Mario title before my birthday.

what would you add to this list?

and what the hell are "Pooh sticks"?

Friday night I was at a rather quaint gathering and was stewing in my own juices of self hatred that were brought to a speacial ripeness with my impending firedness, the loss of my prized stereo, and all the other little things that make life slightly less worth living. Then I got a brilliant idea! "Fool, we are freaking going to Mexico! Dude, seriously, we are going to freakin Mexico. And at about 12 at night, on a whim, we went to Mexico. It was freaking sweet. We saw a guy with leaprasy wash a car with a dirty towel then wipe is sweating face off with towel, had authentic gorditas, got a minor hang over at 3 in the afternoon after a morning of pacifico, tecate, brandy, and a really good mexican gin complimented by the best limes ever.

All I have to say is guys, the answer to all your problems is in Mexico. I wonder if Tom Cruise would concede Mexico as being an acceptable alternative to Psychology.

NASA's Deep Impact Fireworks to Light Up Space on 4th of July

My fourth of July holidays the last 3.85 years have completely sucked. Three years ago, wasn't invited to the party... alone. Two years ago, was invited to the party but left thoroughly upset because people suck.... alone. One year ago, no party, sat on the roof with two roommates and a landlord watching the fireworks... alone.

That situation has seemingly resolved itself, but the current situation doesn't prove to be much more satisfying. I say that now, I could be wrong. Time will tell. I do know that I will be watching the fireworks (if I can see them from the new apartment's roof) alone this year. No roommates. No boyfriend. Alone. Woe is me.

Please tell me you all have much more exciting and fulfilling plans for your holiday weekend. I will live vicariously through you.

CNN.com - Pink Floyd reuniting for Live 8 - Jun 12, 2005

the funniest thing about this (other than picturing the inevitable clash on stage when Roger Waters starts flogging David Gilmour with the leg he ripped off of one of those giant inflatable pigs) is that their set is only 15 minutes. if you've ever listened to Pink Floyd, you know that any one of their actual songs is about 10 minutes long. i've heard their cramming in "Breathe" (a shorter intro song from "Dark Side") and "Comfortably Numb".

it's a shame that the Pink Floyd reunion that we thought would never come will be so short. i guess it's for the best, though... those pigs could do some damage to a man.

oh, and the members of U2 will be dressing up like Sargent Pepper characters! ...what?

BUT I'M FUCKING GOING TO NOW! MY CAR STUFF GOT JACKED AND I WANT SOME FUCKING VENGENCE.

Hey E301 crowd, remember when this happened roughly a year ago this month and I got cleaned out? I'm probably getting fired Tuesday too. You know what else? I have no luck with girls. LIFE IS FUCKING SWELL!